Friday, May 31, 2013

Buh Bye Summer Vaca

that's it.
i'm done.
i'm giving up on you summer vacation.
6 days in and all you've done is let me down.
are you playing a joke on me?
if you are, it's not funny.
do you see me laughing?
cuz i'm not.
arguing siblings? expected.
boredom? a given. 
a sick son who pukes at the mall? i can deal. (barely)
BUT
the pooping-her-pants-at-my-house neighbor kid is where i draw the line.
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!
i'm dead serious. 
do you know how disgusting it is to walk around your home and find smeared neighbor poop?
of course you don't. your life consists of animal shaped clouds, delicious popsicles, and perfectly bahaved children running through sprinklers.
i knew i was smelling something funky.  
i knew it.
everywhere that little twerp's butt sat i found a smear.
clorox please.
febreeze please.
barf bag please.
dear sweet jesus above help me please. i do not have the coping skills to deal with this today. 
so mr. summer vacation you better watch out.
if you keep this nonsense up i will gather all the booger picking, poopie pants, cry baby children in the universe and make you babysit.
consider this your first and last warning.
i mean it.
and that's final.

p.s. did i mention child 2 poked her straw through her capri sun pouch creating old faithful at lunch today? yep. all over the kitchen floor. capri sun's are so dumb. obviously a mother did not invent them.

Have an excellent weekend everyone!:)





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